Gary's blog for couples and parents plus resources for individuals, leaders and churches.

Saturday, July 23, 2011

A Lasting Marriage: The Power of a Kiss


The other day I discovered that my wife had a bag of Hershey's Kisses in the pantry. I hadn't seen that many of those for a while but I quickly remembered how much I had always enjoyed them. And then I also realized that they've been making those kisses for a long time.

I remember having them as a kid, pulling on the little string sticking out on top, unwrapping the shiny cover and popping it into my mouth. In fact, just to enjoy that memory a bit more I took a few out of the bag in the pantry and re-did my ritual from years ago.

I'm glad those Hershey Kisses are still around but I wonder how many couples are taking advantage of the importance of a kiss or two around their house. Sure, the passionate kind are probably still pretty popular in our most romantic moments but I'm talking about the small ones that come in simple wrapping and are just a taste for more.

I think those little kisses represent a lot in a marriage and say much to our spouse about what they mean to us. Regular little kisses are first of all touches. You probably know about the studies done on the importance of touch with a newborn. The truth of the matter is we all need human touch on a regular basis and a kiss adds extra spark and importance to that touch when it's with your spouse.

Second, little kisses show that we notice each other and that we're important to the other. When we come together after a few hours, a day or even weeks, a kiss says, "I missed you," and "No one or no thing is more important than seeing you again right now."

Third, kisses suggest that we want to be with and show affection that isn't only centered around sex. When we skip simple acts of touch, tenderness and closeness we can send the message to the other person that we only value that intimacy when it's in the bedroom. Chances are that if we regularly give kisses we're also often holding hands, giving back rubs and sharing hugs.

Finally, regular kisses can be one of many good habits that add to our relationship. Like having date nights, regular time together, praying for each other and the like, kissing adds a healthy connection that will add strength to your emotional foundations and love for each other.

So, if you've been off the "kisses" lately, try a handful in the next few days. Somehow I have a feeling you'll be saying to yourself like I did with those Hershey ones, "You know, I think I'd like another."
Gary Sinclair Writer | Speaker | Leader

Gary is currently a consultant, teacher, speaker and chaplain providing resources for families, leaders and churches.

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